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Rollerchairball Replaces Quantum Mechanics as 20th Century’s Biggest Breakthrough
“I decided to go back and take a look at the century again,” said Hozen Bogerdozen during a press conference, just after finishing his 15th Rollerchairball game in a single night. “This game,” he went on, through his interpreter, “like the sun, has changed the way I see the world.”
A few months ago, after being introduced to Rollerchairball by his longtime yodeling partner, Brandon Lock, Mr. Bogerdozen was hooked. When he found out the game was created before the year 2000, he began hiccuping and then passed out. “I’d just finished the manuscript for my newest book, ‘The 20th Century’s Quantum Leap: Not the TV Show,’ so you can understand how I felt when I realized I’d just wasted seven years of research and writing time. Plus, I’d just pounded a Crave Case.”
When asked what he was thinking as he came to consciousness, Mr. Bogerdozen said this: “I suddenly realized that I had no idea what quantum mechanics was, or what quantum mechanics means, or even why I was wearing a life jacket, since it wasn’t Wednesday.”
Mr. Bogerdozen went on: “But I knew what I had to do. Rollerchairball needs to be recognized for what it is, a divine sport.”
When asked if Mr. Bogerdozen will throw out his entire quantum mechanics manuscript completely, or keep portions of it as a sort of template for the Rollerchairball book, he had this to say: “No, I’ll be keeping it. All I’m going to do is just take out all the parts that say ‘quantum mechanics’ and replace them with ‘Rollerchairball.’ Maybe throw in some other stuff. It shouldn’t be a problem.”
Here is an excerpt from the book: “In physics, Rollerchairball is the study of the relationship between energy quanta (radiation) and matter. Rollerchairball is also a fundamental branch of physics with wide applications in both experimental and theoretical physics. The effects of Rollerchairball are typically not observable on macroscopic scales, but become evident at the atomic and subatomic level. Rollerchairball theory generalizes all classical theories, and provides accurate descriptions for many previously unexplained phenomena such as The Lone Ranger and arguing with the ref.
(Thank you to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quantum_mechanics for its contribution to the last paragraph of this article)
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