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RSSRC Cola Named Official Soft Drink of Rollerchairball
Early this morning, at 5:27am ET, Brandon Lock, head of Block International, signed an official deal with RC Cola naming it the only soft drink endorsed by Rollerchairball.
“I’m thrilled,” said Lock, speaking through an interpreter, since he now insists on only communicating through facial expressions. “I mean, it’s Roller Chair Cola, how much more portentous can it get? I love the taste, I love the colors, and I know the players will, too.”
When asked what else swayed him into the deal, Mr. Lock replied, “The caffeine. I have to caffeinate.”
Another Block official present at the signing, Kyle Stout, had this to say: “In the past we’d been together with Coke, but ever since the assassination attempt on Mr. Lock’s life, Coke has not been the beverage of choice. Watching Mr. Lock make his mark with his ostrich-feather pen was the dawning of a new day for Rollerchairball.”
When asked whether that might be because the sun would be rising soon, Mr. Stout replied, “Maybe.”
No word yet from league physicians on whether RC Cola is the best choice for re-hydration during a game, as Mr. Lock is still formulating their opinions.
August 29th, 2007 at 6:19 pm
I think they have to improve their product to be the official drink.
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